6 Things I Wish I Knew with Our First Baby
Exciting news to share with you this week: we’re now officially a family of FOUR!
Two weeks ago today, we welcomed Madilyn Kate into our family, and we’ve been in a state of blissful exhaustion since the moment she arrived.
She really is the most perfect little thing. I forgot just how tiny and precious they are as newborns: the delicate fingers, the happy little grunts and squawks, the soft, soft skin… our entire family is completely over the moon about her arrival and obsessed with her beyond words.
Big sister Mila is especially in LOVE with her new baby sis! She loves helping mommy and daddy take care of her, as well as her own baby dolls, and has been an absolute champ about welcoming this new little roommate into our home.
And while the exhaustion is REAL, I’m happy to report that the overwhelm is not as extreme this time around; with this being our second little one, we had a go-to list of tips and tricks to help this baby girl (and us) acclimate more smoothly this time around… and that’s exactly what I’m excited to share with you below.
Here’s a list of six things I WISH I knew with our first baby that we’re doing from day one with our second.
01. The eat / awake / sleep routine is life changing.
I feel like no one really informed me of this routine early on, and it completely changed the game for us, so I’m sharing with you now: babies like routines, and in the early days, the eat / awake / sleep routine is EVERYTHING.
As a newborn, babies are on a 2-3 hour eating schedule. But what isn’t often communicated is that eating is only part of the routine; awake time and sleep time is also a crucial part of the routine that makes it work so beautifully.
With our firstborn, we found ourselves trying to constantly read her cues; is she hungry? Sleepy? Does she have a dirty diaper? We were always guessing, and it was exhausting and frustrating to not know HOW to help her when she was so upset.
After learning about the eat / awake / sleep routine, she was a different baby: happier, more well rested, and we felt more confident in how much she was eating throughout the day.
With our second, we implemented this routine from day one… and WHAT A DIFFERENCE it made.
We can live our lives in a calmer state of mind (not to mention, we’re actually able to sleep a little more soundly with a newborn, as well), and little miss is happy, well-rested, and well-fed little thing.
The cycles and wake windows extend as baby gets older, but the concept is the same and well worth trying if you’re struggling with reading little one’s cues in those early days.
02. The Baby Shusher (and sound machines, in general) is a baby’s sleep BFF.
Have you heard of the Baby Shusher? It’s our little one’s sleep BFF… and ours, too. We first heard of this product through our newborn photographer, and we’re SO glad we pulled the trigger to get one for ourselves with baby number two.
It’s essentially a little portable sound machine that features a real human voice doing a “shushing” sound at the volume and length of time you desire. Our daughter LOVES this thing because the sound is so calming for her, and it helps her fall asleep every time. By the time the shusher turns off automatically, she’s dead asleep and generally doesn’t need additional help with staying asleep.
On that note, we also started using the Hatch sound machine way sooner with our second. Both girls currently sleep well to the “tumble dry” sound, and as a bonus, it helps drown out noise from us or each other in the middle of the night so sleep isn’t disturbed from room to room.
GRANTED: I know this isn’t the case for every baby. Our first was a bit more difficult to put to sleep (and keep asleep); but it’s certainly worth a try if you’re struggling with helping your little one fall asleep comfortably and happily.
03. You might need to try a few varieties of bottle nipples and pacifiers.
We lucked out with our first girl — she took to both nursing and bottles like a champ. We didn’t have to go around sampling different bottles and nipples because whatever we gave her, she loved.
With our second, that wasn’t so much the case. She quickly made it clear that she preferred one bottle nipple shape over the others, so after a little experimenting, we bought a few more of what was working and stuck with those alone.
So if you find your little one is struggling with a bottle, it might not be that he or she ONLY wants to nurse… they might just prefer a different kind of nipple.
P.S. We had the same issue with her pacifiers! Our first didn’t take a paci (or so we thought… we never fully experimented with options), but our second made it clear that she preferred a certain kind early on, and we stuck with those going forward. For us, it was worth a little bit of experimenting to find what worked best!
04. One of the best things you can do for your milk supply is to drink LOTS of water.
There are many “hacks” out there for upping your milk supply — like lactation cookies, cluster nursing, etc. And some of them genuinely do work! But the one thing I found that makes the MOST difference in my supply is when I’m able to consciously stay fully hydrated throughout the day (like even more than I think I need).
If your hospital sent you home with a water jug, USE IT. Or if they didn’t, this is your excuse to go buy a cute one that holds at least 28 ounces of water. Make it a goal to drink at least a cup or more each time you nurse or pump, as well as in between sessions, and you’re more likely to notice a healthy increase in your milk supply with this tip alone.
Cluster nursing or pumping has also been a great way to increase supply for me and worth trying if you’re worried about your supply dipping too soon.
05. The hard nights ARE temporary.
I’m not dismissing just how hard those nights can be… I recall nights with our firstborn that felt like they’d go on forever and that I’d truly NEVER sleep again.
But then, we’d reach one month, and she was finally figuring out her days and nights. And we’d reach two or three months, and she’d be sleeping even longer stretches at night. Before we knew it, she was legitimately sleeping through the night, a blessing that felt life changing as new parents.
(And we also did a form of sleep training at 11 months that completely changed ALL of our lives for the better, including little miss, as she struggled less and slept more, waking up happier each morning.)
Maybe two or four or six months seems like an eternity away for you. If going into nighttime feels anxiety-driven for you, try giving yourself something positive to look forward to in case of those random wakings, like podcasts or prayer or making lists… something engaging you love that can easily be done with a sweet baby in your arms to help make those long nights a little more enjoyable.
06. They grow way too fast.
Ok yes, this one is cliché… but let me tell you: we were so overwhelmed with our first baby girl that we truly didn’t take the time to fully appreciate how tiny and precious she was in those first few weeks. To be honest, the first couple of months were a blur with her as we tried to figure out how to do life with a newborn.
With our second baby girl, we felt more confident going into those intimidating newborn days — and that also meant that we were able to more fully appreciate all the details of life with this tiny human… from her hands and fuzzy post-bath hair to her little squeaks and teeny diapers.
The days and nights may feel long, but the weeks go quickly, so we’re being even more intentional with our time with her in these early days.
Curious to hear more about her birth story or other details of how we’re managing day-to-day? Let me know here! I’d love to know what you want to hear more about on the blog.
With love + inspiration from our home to yours,
Jenna
